To Listen While Reading


Thursday, December 26, 2013

For Payton

Dear Payton,

I know you're going to see this because we're going to be exchanging Christmas gifts tomorrow and if you don't see this before then, I have led you to see this now. Here's why I decided to blog about/for you... I felt like going public (as public as potentially literally anyone in the whole world reading this) about how I feel about you. I could write you another poem out on paper, and I will always do that, but I feel like letting everyone in on how amazing I think you are and how much I love you. I hope someone stumbles across this and remembers that love is real and amazing and magical and everything they've ever dreamed of as a lovely human, just like we have. So without further ado, here is my love for you.
Wow... where do I start? What do I feel like I can actually say? I can fathom a lot of imaginative ways to express the simple and bold love that I feel for you, but I want you to hear (and/or read it) honestly, straight from my heart. Like a profession or a confession or something.
Love... You make me so so so so very happy. I feel like I can feel my heart smiling every time I think of you. I hear it speaking of all the wonderful things about you as a human, as the most creatively awesome person I know, a complete talent, an amazing man, a loving boyfriend all wrapped up in words that my heart cherishes, like "my baby" and "sweetie" and "love" or "lovey." You make my heart gush like a little girl and all that little girls want is for their hearts to gush. You found the key to my heart and unlocked the dam that was keeping my rivers of love from overflowing, and now they're overflowing for you (and moreso for other people too now). You are so entirely precious to me in the least girly sense. You are precious to me in the sense that I completely care about your heart and desires and dreams and 1000% want to be there to support you in all that you do and do those things with you, just like you're there for me and care about me. I FREAKING CARE ABOUT YOU! A lot! A whole lot! I love getting to know you, too. I absolutely love hearing your heart for the world because it's beautiful and always reminds me that the world is a beautiful place. You are passionate and loving and caring for every single person that you meet. And you are entirely fun when you speak love. It's just such a pure expression...sometimes I try to think about your expressions too much, like how they can be the way they are in such passion...but then I realize that YOU'RE JUST LOVE! AND SO MUCH OF IT! How can you ask love how it loves? It just does! And there's just literally nothing you can do to change it. Wow, that's good, haha. And there you go again...teaching me things about things and Papa all over again. Man! I CANNOT WAIT TO MARRY YOU! It's gonna be the absolute best and it's crazy and it's like my dreams are coming true and it's amazing and makes me feel like a girl all giddy and excited and I just love it all, okay??? ;) I just love you!!! And I just want the whole stinking world to know it! I would do anything to just be there for and with you, and I perfectly intend to do that forever with you, baby. You are my everything in a way that my heart has always longed to love a boy in this rules finally meeting the passionate treasure of a boy that your heart has waited so long to know. And I'm so freaking glad it's you, Payton. I'm so freaking glad and so stinking happy and passionate about you! You are the best and I am beyond stoked to tell you that every single day, even before we marry. You are just every good thing incarnate and I love that you love me and that I love you and that our love is changing the world as we speak. We're going to do AMAAAAAAZZZZIIIIINNNNGGG things together, love, and I can't wait to see what happens when the love bombs go off and you take off flying. You are my hero, baby. You are perfect and I LOVE YOU. SO FREAKING MUCH. Ughhhhhhh! Haha ;)

Martina, your adoring girlfriend ;)

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